My niece, Jenna, is nearing the end of her kindergarten year, and getting smarter and more independent every day. She’s not just smarter than ever; she’s also clever enough to use her skills to come up with fun treats and surprises for her mom, all the while concealing her plans through indirect questions and subtle misdirection. For Mother’s Day this year, she put together a surprise plan to really pamper Mommy (my sister) from the moment she woke up. In retrospect, there were little hints that could have tipped my sister off, but I’ll just relate the story as I heard it, and you can decide for yourself whether you’d have caught on.

(The day before Mother’s Day…)

Jenna: Mommy, are you going to sleep late tomorrow?

Mommy: I don’t know, Jenna. I’ll probably be up pretty early like usual to make breakfast for you and Christa. Why?

Jenna: I think you should stay up really late tonight so you’ll be really tired and sleep late tomorrow. I can make food for me and Christa. I promise not to make a mess.

Mommy: Okay. Sounds good.

Phase I – complete. Mommy didn’t see through the small talk, and is planning on sleeping in.

(That evening, Jenna surveys the contents of the refrigerator and freezer, while Mommy relaxes in the living room.)

Jenna: Mommy, do you like tamales?

Mommy: Sure. Why?

Jenna: Just wondering.

Phase II – complete. Mommy seemed a little suspicious there when she started asking questions, so better wait a few minutes to let her drop her guard again.

(A few minutes later…)

Jenna: Mommy, how long would it take to cook a tamale in the microwave?

Mommy: I would cook it for one minute, but before I do, I wrap it in a wet paper towel so it won’t turn out dry.

Main course…check. Cooking directions…check. Mommy still doesn’t suspect anything…check. Condiments…uh-oh.

(A few minutes later…)

Jenna: Mommy, the sour cream is a little hard to reach. Do you think you could move it down a little?

Mommy: Sure.

Phase III – complete.

As morning breaks on Mother’s Day, Mommy threatens the whole mission by getting out of bed too early. This close to zero hour, it could spell disaster.

Jenna (just getting out of bed herself): Mommy! Why aren’t you still sleeping?

Mommy: I just got up to go to the bathroom. I was thinking of going back to bed if you girls don’t need me up yet. Should I do that?

Jenna: Yes! You just sleep and don’t worry about us.

Mommy: Okay.

Over the next few minutes, the soothing sounds of tamale preparation reverberate through the house: refrigerator door opening and closing, footsteps to the shortest sink in the house (in the downstairs bathroom), water running, chair dragging on the hard kitchen floor, microwave beeping, cabinets and drawers opening and closing, microwave indicating that it’s finished, more chair dragging, and some indistinct clattering. If Mommy hadn’t returned to bed and immediately fallen back into a deep sleep, it would have been a suspicious ruckus. Stealth mode has worked like a charm, though, and Phase IV – the most difficult phase – is nearly complete.  All that’s left is to pour a glass of juice…and…and…boy, this juice is hard to open.

(Back upstairs…)

Jenna:  Mommy, can you open this juice for me?

Mommy: Sure. (Opens juice.)

Jenna:  Thanks, you can go back to sleep now.

Back downstairs to pour some juice to go with the tamale that’s been ready for a few minutes now, and it’s Phase IV – complete.  All that’s left is to wait patiently for Mommy to get up, for the funnest phase of all.

(Thirty seconds later…)

Jenna: Mommy! Are you ready to get up yet?

Mommy: Yep, that extra five minutes was just the sleeping in I needed! Well, I better come downstairs and make breakfast. I wonder what we should eat this morning?

As Mommy makes breakfast small talk on the way down the stairs, Jenna is bursting with pride and it’s all she can do to let Mommy discover the surprise for herself without just telling her. Christa (a couple years younger) is equally proud, since she helped, but she was just extra muscle on this operation – Jenna was the brains.

When all three of them get to the kitchen, Mommy’s eyes light up in happy surprise, stunned to see breakfast already waiting for her on the kitchen table! (If you don’t know what she had by now, you haven’t been paying attention.)

Mommy: Jenna, were you planning to surprise me all along?

Jenna: Yes!

Christa: Yes!

Mommy: Wow, this is exactly what I was thinking would be good for breakfast, too. Thanks!

Jenna: You’re welcome! Happy Mother’s Day!

My sister told me it was the best half-cooked, soggy Mother’s Day breakfast tamale she ever ate.  (Final Phase – complete.)